----------------------------------------
2.26.2012
Pissed off at my blogskin now. CHANGING IT.
Oh life. How spirited thou art.
I am very sick right now. On the upswing, thank goodness. It's been over a week now. UGH. I think God must have invented Advil Cold and Flu, because it is my savior. Seriously, sick people, buy it. Thou shalt be saved.
So, the last few months I have been single, and I have been mostly glad for it. There are times I crave a snuggle, but those pass. However, once again, I'm swept into the awkward throws of a budding relationship. This time, though, I don't know what to do about it. The man is very sweet, and I'm not doing anything to dissuade his advances. He is not the type of man I can just date for a few months then toss off. The bloody male has a good heart, and I don't want to be the one to break it.
Yet, I do not want a relationship. I want... I don't know what I want. Casual? Friends with benefits, I suppose? I want to be with someone who doesn't give a fuck. Whatever that means.
Even though I like him, I can't date this guy. He's so young. I'm so goddamn vain. I can't be in a serious relationship. Maybe 3 years down the road. But not now. Should I tell him no, straight off the bat? Can I? Holding hands can be so comforting.
But no. I'll tell him. I think that would be for the best. I don't want to hurt him any more than I have to.


